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Quote from: Doormouse
Yeah I carry a vial of chloroform and a rag at all times. For protection.


Now that bagman is devirginised(Read 21860 times)
Now that bagman is devirginised on: February 27, 2009, 10:17:30 AM
...what do we have left to sell?

Empscum?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #1 on: February 27, 2009, 11:35:06 AM
I say we all go in and get the ladies a Diva Cup, pass it around to them and sell what it collects.
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #2 on: February 27, 2009, 11:49:35 AM
No, go this route:
http://www.mooncup.com/
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #3 on: February 27, 2009, 02:00:24 PM
Oh did that finally happen?  Bagman losing his virginity?  Well I'm way less enthused than I thought I'd be.

Anybody wanna sell me some dignity?
~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #4 on: February 28, 2009, 08:42:50 PM
Sorry, I haven't a square to spare ...
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #5 on: March 01, 2009, 10:50:52 AM
Im a proud diva user!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #6 on: March 01, 2009, 12:01:48 PM
How ecologically sound and also disgusting of you. But I've been thinking of blowing my nose and collecting it too...
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #7 on: March 01, 2009, 12:29:11 PM
[cunt]Ecology esmology, that product is obviously a P.A.T.R.I.A.R.C.H. plot to denigrate mothers and women over thirty, undermining their self-image and therefore making them more pliant to the advances of their disgusting man-dicks![/cunt]
It's truly a shame I am no longer there to yell at girls to make out with you.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #8 on: March 01, 2009, 08:21:58 PM
its not about being ecologically sound, though that's a nice perk I suppose.
It's about doing the best thing for my sanity during that TOM. Tampons, frankly, fucking hurt. The alternative sucks.
This thing rocks and is fun and hilarious to empty and makes a great suction "pop" sound as it comes out. DELICIOUS!

I ought to take pics for bagman!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #9 on: March 01, 2009, 08:35:06 PM
Please, spare me.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #10 on: March 01, 2009, 08:35:28 PM
Bagman isn't a virgin anymore?  I feel like we've time traveled to another reality that I can no longer stand to be a part of.
Pour the wine, hold the grind, quarter to nine, let's go.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #11 on: March 02, 2009, 12:26:49 AM
don't worry, you can read all about it here
Loaded-Gun.com - I don't know what the hell they are talking about or why they are even there. They don't make serious points and they don't joke, but they still manage to make a lot of posts somehow.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #12 on: March 02, 2009, 10:41:42 AM
I know, chad. It's hard to believe,  but it's true.

And don't worry, bagman. i'll never top the awesome picture of the cotton pony that tricky sent to you.

it was so brilliant, it brings a tear to my eye



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #13 on: March 02, 2009, 02:55:09 PM
Oh wow, I just had a nasty ass flashback. That memory had been repressed for many years. How did she get me to open the picture again?? Did she say it was a naked picture of her or something?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #14 on: March 02, 2009, 05:17:21 PM
I know, chad. It's hard to believe,  but it's true.

And don't worry, bagman. i'll never top the awesome picture of the cotton pony that tricky sent to you.

it was so brilliant, it brings a tear to my eye

I do not remember this... please refresh my memory.

I've said it a million times and I'll say it again, my memory sucks. In the last few years it's gotten pretty bad. And I don't even smokle weed all that much!
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #15 on: March 02, 2009, 08:12:59 PM
Man, I smokle weed all the timle!
ever tried. ever failed. no matter. try again. fail again. fail better.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #16 on: March 02, 2009, 08:19:00 PM
Does it help your memory?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #17 on: March 02, 2009, 08:59:40 PM
Bagman is afraid of feminine hygiene pass it on.
It's truly a shame I am no longer there to yell at girls to make out with you.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #18 on: March 02, 2009, 11:02:40 PM
More disgusted than afraid.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #19 on: March 02, 2009, 11:06:34 PM
More disgusted than afraid.

Tell me what I did! I sent you a pic of a used tampon? Was it my used tampon?

If that's the case, man, I'm so awesome.
« Last Edit: March 02, 2009, 11:07:07 PM by tricky »
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #20 on: March 02, 2009, 11:40:24 PM
Can you send Dave a picture of your used sanitary wear?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #21 on: March 03, 2009, 02:52:16 AM
on it...
Loaded-Gun.com - I don't know what the hell they are talking about or why they are even there. They don't make serious points and they don't joke, but they still manage to make a lot of posts somehow.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #22 on: March 03, 2009, 06:00:35 AM
sweeeeeet



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #23 on: March 03, 2009, 01:19:56 PM
I guess Dave will have to wait a few weeks. My period just ended! Does Dave prefer sanitary pads or tampons?
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #24 on: March 03, 2009, 02:24:16 PM
I guess Dave will have to wait a few weeks. My period just ended! Does Dave prefer sanitary pads or tampons?

Ugh, my Hot Pocket is wanting to come back up.
~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #25 on: March 03, 2009, 05:06:18 PM
I guess Dave will have to wait a few weeks. My period just ended! Does Dave prefer sanitary pads or tampons?

Napkins are good; I can wipe the drool from my face ...
Tampons are good; I can floss after I eat ...

Your choice ...

BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #26 on: March 03, 2009, 05:07:47 PM
Ugh, my Hot Pocket is wanting to come back up.

Hmm, I never tried using a hot pocket as a sanitary napkin before, good idea!
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #27 on: March 03, 2009, 05:34:33 PM
Thanks for forever ruining Hot Pockets for me.
~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #28 on: March 03, 2009, 05:42:26 PM
OK here's something that's always bothered me about chicks.

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. That is filthy. I notice you also all go to the bathroom together. Again, WTF? Imagine if guys did such things, like if a bunch of roommates all started syncing up their mid-morning bowel movements. I have to say unconscious collective behavior really disgusts me. I'd recommend you all cut it the fuck out.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #29 on: March 03, 2009, 05:52:03 PM
OK here's something that's always bothered me about chicks.

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. That is filthy. I notice you also all go to the bathroom together. Again, WTF? Imagine if guys did such things, like if a bunch of roommates all started syncing up their mid-morning bowel movements. I have to say unconscious collective behavior really disgusts me. I'd recommend you all cut it the fuck out.

Women are pretty gross.  I'd be gay if guys weren't hideous.  If I could clone myself except my clone was a super hot chick with my brain, I'd totally marry him/her/me.

Is that narcissistic?
« Last Edit: March 03, 2009, 05:53:24 PM by Drugmoth »
~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #30 on: March 03, 2009, 06:25:19 PM
valid
Loaded-Gun.com - I don't know what the hell they are talking about or why they are even there. They don't make serious points and they don't joke, but they still manage to make a lot of posts somehow.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #31 on: March 03, 2009, 10:30:20 PM
OK here's something that's always bothered me about chicks.

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. That is filthy. I notice you also all go to the bathroom together. Again, WTF? Imagine if guys did such things, like if a bunch of roommates all started syncing up their mid-morning bowel movements. I have to say unconscious collective behavior really disgusts me. I'd recommend you all cut it the fuck out.

Women are pretty gross.  I'd be gay if guys weren't hideous.  If I could clone myself except my clone was a super hot chick with my brain, I'd totally marry him/her/me.

Is that narcissistic?

Textbook ...
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #32 on: March 04, 2009, 01:07:19 AM
OK here's something that's always bothered me about chicks.

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. That is filthy. I notice you also all go to the bathroom together. Again, WTF? Imagine if guys did such things, like if a bunch of roommates all started syncing up their mid-morning bowel movements. I have to say unconscious collective behavior really disgusts me. I'd recommend you all cut it the fuck out.

Women are pretty gross.  I'd be gay if guys weren't hideous.  If I could clone myself except my clone was a super hot chick with my brain, I'd totally marry him/her/me.

Is that narcissistic?

Nah dude, thats not narcissitic, that's GAY!

I bet you eat your own creampies.
« Last Edit: March 04, 2009, 01:07:52 AM by Mosh »



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #33 on: March 04, 2009, 01:23:14 AM
"J" almost blew my goo on my face Sunday. She was beating my meat, and when I erupted she pointed my cock upwards. Speckles hit just above my nipple. Gross.

« Last Edit: March 04, 2009, 01:23:42 AM by bagman »



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #34 on: March 04, 2009, 02:01:37 AM
I'll get bagman's new address and you guys can send him all the used tampons you can fit in a box.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #35 on: March 04, 2009, 02:19:06 AM
Hahaha. I dare you.




Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #36 on: March 04, 2009, 07:03:01 AM
This actually CAN end well...
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #37 on: March 04, 2009, 07:17:07 AM
Oh I'm excited!
~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #38 on: March 04, 2009, 08:45:13 AM
OK here's something that's always bothered me about chicks.

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. ... I have to say unconscious collective behavior really disgusts me.

well, in this case, that's actually horomonal.  You could saturate the air with the same kinds of horomones that spew out of pre-menstrual girls, and they'd sync to that release.

So, it can't be unconscious.
Like yours.  Only different.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #39 on: March 04, 2009, 08:58:18 AM
Correction: so it can be conscious.

Hormones are normally unconscious releases. The only exception is in the Revenge of the Nerds radio-play when the Nerds break into the biochem building, steal vials of estrogen and release them into the air-ducts of Phi Sigma Sigma. And even in that rare case, it's only conscious on the part of the Nerds. So I'm sticking to my initial self-righteous disgust. Control yourselves, ladies. Don't give in to peer pressure.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #40 on: March 04, 2009, 09:14:04 AM
Hormones are normally unconscious releases.

I guess I'm thinking of it as biological and separate from the brain, and I'm thinking of unconscious as having to do with brain activity.

Otherwise, you could say that gastric rumbles are unconscious behaviors, that toenails growing is an unconscious behavior, or that a joint popping is an unconscious behavior.

Or, to bring this down to the LG level once more, that my ejaculation upon your mother's tits is unconscious.
Like yours.  Only different.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #41 on: March 04, 2009, 09:26:03 AM
Yeah, the ejaculatory act itself is unconscious, but imagining it's goatse's asshole you're coming onto/into is a conscious act.

Consciousness requires a cognizance of and usually control over. Hormones and ejaculate can emerge when you're asleep or comatose and without control.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #42 on: March 04, 2009, 05:59:47 PM
I put sand in the Vaseline when I sleepwalk ...
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #43 on: March 05, 2009, 09:20:55 AM
Yeah, the ejaculatory act itself is unconscious, but imagining it's goatse's asshole you're coming onto/into is a conscious act.

Consciousness requires a cognizance of and usually control over. Hormones and ejaculate can emerge when you're asleep or comatose and without control.

and without a brain!
I think you need a brain to be able to have unconscious acts.  otherwise, it's just biological.
Like yours.  Only different.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #44 on: March 05, 2009, 09:29:07 AM
Consciousness resides in the brain. Hence why "getting knocked unconscious" can be euphemized into "getting knocked brainless" but not "getting knocked into your underlying motivations." In other words you're speaking about the psychological "unconscious mind" and I'm speaking of the physiological "unconscious."



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #45 on: March 05, 2009, 09:49:00 AM
Consciousness resides in the brain. Hence why "getting knocked unconscious" can be euphemized into "getting knocked brainless" but not "getting knocked into your underlying motivations." In other words you're speaking about the psychological "unconscious mind" and I'm speaking of the physiological "unconscious."

right!

and rather than use the same word ("unconscious") to mean two different things, I'm clarifying your "physiological unconscious" as "biological".
Like yours.  Only different.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #46 on: March 05, 2009, 10:12:53 AM
No you're shortening your "unconscious mind" into "unconscious." The term "biological" is way too broad for my purposes. It covers both of our meanings. The problem is that the physiological "unconsciousness" is a misnomer. It would more properly be termed "non-consciousness." As such I'm prepared to clarify but not emend my statement thus:

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. ... I have to say non-conscious collective behavior really disgusts me.

Sadly this cuts out:
I notice you also all go to the bathroom together. Again, WTF?

Perhaps this is the best:
Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. ... I have to say collective behavior that is not self-willed really disgusts me. C'mon ladies, where's your wille zur macht?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #47 on: March 05, 2009, 10:50:10 PM
You both:




Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #48 on: March 06, 2009, 09:46:46 AM
No you're shortening your "unconscious mind" into "unconscious." The term "biological" is way too broad for my purposes. It covers both of our meanings. The problem is that the physiological "unconsciousness" is a misnomer. It would more properly be termed "non-consciousness." As such I'm prepared to clarify but not emend my statement thus:

Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. ... I have to say non-conscious collective behavior really disgusts me.

Sadly this cuts out:
I notice you also all go to the bathroom together. Again, WTF?

Perhaps this is the best:
Apparently when you live together your menstrual cycles all start to match up and cycle at the same time. ... I have to say collective behavior that is not self-willed really disgusts me. C'mon ladies, where's your wille zur macht?

I'll accept this.  :)
« Last Edit: March 06, 2009, 09:47:04 AM by eitje »
Like yours.  Only different.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #49 on: March 06, 2009, 12:37:42 PM
Haha OK. I love how we were in agreement the whole time, but it took the form of an argument. It was enough to irritate at least one other person so I'd declare it a partial success.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #50 on: March 06, 2009, 05:53:03 PM
I thought brains weren't allowed on this board ...

Mosh, update the disclaimer ...
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #51 on: August 26, 2009, 03:12:37 PM
mmm virgin men. drooool.
Ive had me a virgin boy. we were 17 then, but still uber fun.
I rocked that boys world. He still comes back for his fix every few years.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #52 on: August 26, 2009, 03:27:25 PM
Baggy was 28.
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #53 on: August 26, 2009, 03:51:24 PM
Yeah, I read that.  I hope it was the best pussy he could get. Why didnt he just pay for it? Or give it away and regret it later like the rest of us?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #54 on: August 26, 2009, 03:53:17 PM
He "wanted it to mean something". Eventually he just started picking up women on Craigslist, fucking them and dumping them.

But, to quote Elvin Bishop:

He fooled around and fell in love...
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #55 on: August 26, 2009, 04:13:37 PM
Hahahahaha what a naiive fucker. doesnt he know you dont have to be in love to get a woody?

Dont waste wood. It makes jeebus cry.

and cl?
Dude, have some class and shell out the member fee for onlineboootycall.com



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #56 on: August 26, 2009, 04:19:27 PM
Meh he got cooties from one of them. And now they're dating.
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #57 on: August 26, 2009, 04:43:07 PM
hahahahahaha

If yougot cooties you might as well date and fuck em over by marrying em. the ultimate punishment.
« Last Edit: August 26, 2009, 04:49:11 PM by Hilder »



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #58 on: August 26, 2009, 05:22:28 PM
The year ain't over yet...
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #59 on: August 27, 2009, 01:32:19 AM
From virgin to STD in 8 months.

Not paying for sex was more a pride thing for me (still is), it's not that I wanted my first sex to "mean something" or some emo shit. It was the fact that I didn't want to pay for the sex, and I also didn't want to have to explain to the first real girl I liked/loved that I paid for sex. I mean I didn't tell the girl she was my first until almost two months after the fact. Then it was just nonchalantly. Now that I am completely over the fear of the unknown, I'm a fuck machine.





Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #60 on: August 27, 2009, 04:29:03 AM
I would give you a round of applause for that, but I need not to since you already have "the clap."

Thank you!  Don't forget to tip your bartender!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #61 on: August 27, 2009, 07:06:34 AM
You are so full of shit. You specifically said that you wanted your first time to be "meaningful". We tried to buy you a hooker, talk you through several girls, you weren't having it. And see where it got you. You're like my kid who just turned 21 who just couldn't stay away from his psycho ex-GF with the big tits. And he wouldn't listen to what people told him. Now he has a criminal record and he almost got tied to her for 21 years.

Hope it's not the high 5 next time.
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #62 on: August 27, 2009, 08:01:00 AM
Soooo. youre a tightarse...



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #63 on: August 27, 2009, 09:33:36 AM
the first real girl I liked/loved

as opposed to the fake girls you like/ love?
« Last Edit: August 27, 2009, 09:35:17 AM by tricky »
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #64 on: August 27, 2009, 10:08:50 AM
you upset because they get more cock than you do?
Loaded-Gun.com - I don't know what the hell they are talking about or why they are even there. They don't make serious points and they don't joke, but they still manage to make a lot of posts somehow.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #65 on: August 27, 2009, 10:31:19 AM
I get plenty of cock. thankyouverymuch.

Might I add- REAL cock too! Attached to a real man!
« Last Edit: August 27, 2009, 10:32:20 AM by tricky »
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #66 on: August 27, 2009, 11:08:10 AM
Somebody is cervix deep in the Jersey Guido squad...
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #67 on: August 27, 2009, 02:26:57 PM
Actually, the guy attached to the cock lives in NYC. And isn't a guido.
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #68 on: August 27, 2009, 09:24:18 PM
My bad.
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #69 on: August 27, 2009, 09:33:21 PM
Does he leave snail trails on your dresses?



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #70 on: August 27, 2009, 10:30:09 PM
Nope. But if he so desired, I'd allow it.
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #71 on: August 30, 2009, 11:51:02 PM
I feel used & discarded, like one of bagman's CL playthings.
Like yours.  Only different.



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #72 on: August 31, 2009, 12:59:43 AM
It's ok, you can come back for more tricky lovin' whenever you want!

Just make sure to bring lube this time, k? Cuz that one thing we did kind of hurt.
you treat me like a monologue ho



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #73 on: September 12, 2009, 05:21:19 PM
Did it involve duct tape, a mouse trap, and a rolling pin?
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')



Re: Now that bagman is devirginised Reply #74 on: September 12, 2009, 05:40:48 PM
Duct tape, yes.  Nothing else from your list was involved.
Like yours.  Only different.