Okay, just got up from this one!
I had travelled to a country that I thought might have been in the UK, but there were lots of Chinese or Japanese people around. I was with someone (and an old asian tour guide/business man kind of dude), and we'd stopped at some kind of weird fast-food outdoor cafe to eat and ask for directions. There were a few strange places near us - one looked like an Indian food/drink place (it had Chaat in the name, I think?), another place looked like some kind of strip mall, and in the strip mall was a really sleezy hotel-looking thing.
While we were sitting, we heard people in a restraunt near us (with big glass windows, in the middle of a pond) shouting "*something something something* SAKE!" over and over. In an effort to figure out what was going on, I picked up a menu from the table, which had a blue side (in a foreign language) and a red side (in English). I realized later that this menu was a trap, since picking up & reading the red side indicated to bad guys that you were a tourist! It was at this time that I noticed a skinny asian dude sitting at a table near us, and paying close attention to what we were doing.
Anyway, the menu explained that the "sake!" place served sake, and had three different types of girls available: ones which would read poetry to you, ones which would sing & dance for you, and ones which would do anything for you. I turned to my companion and said "Rather than going where we were intending to go, we should head to that place!!"
Just then, the skinny asian dude stands up and starts talking to the old business man tour guide. I can kind of understand that he's pitching the idea that we should actually come to HIS establishment, which turns out to be the sleezy hotel. He says he can beat the prices they're offering at the other location. To prove it, he asked the old asian guy what kind of girls we like, and the old businessman tells him "smart, but not too pretty. the pretty ones think too highly of themselves."
He brings over this girl about 5 seconds later that looks like a DUDE in a wig. She recites a poem for us (which no one understands), after which a long, uncomfortable silence follows. So, I decide to clap a little, and the skinny asian guy kind of looks at me weird. Then he takes out a little metal plate, and passes it to the person I'm travelling with, who immediately passes it to me.
I get the impression that I'm supposed to tip the person, but I don't have any chinese/japanese money. So, I put some American quarters on the plate, and pass it to the old man.
Some other things happen that I can't remember.
The end of the dream is filled with very short, very ugly japanese-/chinese-style demons in green and black armor trying to steal things from me. My friend (who is now a big black dude) discovers, however, that if you pretend to be blind or deaf, then they leave you alone... except for trying to prove that you're not blind or deaf. Eventually, one of them ends up trying to steal a stapler, and some paper, and so we say "I wonder where the stapler is? I wonder where the paper is?" and the little demon puts them back.
But then the little bastard steals the paper that we stapled together, and takes it apart, looking for a secret.
That's when my alarm goes off!