I hope she doesn't quit it after she hits it.  Girls like that like guys with tattoos, piercing, fixed gear bikes, and big one eyed monsters.

By the way you are a brave soul for dating Kyle.  I hate dating.  I am lucky that every guy I pull into my web I get to know first.

Meh, either way ...
... if she was going to it, it would have happened already

I wouldn't be too sad if it was a hit-it and quit it deal. But just feeling this gal out, I don't think that's what's she's into. I know next to nothing about dating, so I could be wrong. I definitely plan on picking her up at her place on the second date, and sealing the deal with a kiss. I'm not asking, and I'm not waiting for her to ask me, just going in if I feel like we continue to have a good connection.

No forcing anything . If she backs away then I know it's time to move on.

i prefer asking, b/c then you actually are giving the other person a choice.

yes

I always thought it was perceived to be unmanly to ask permission to kiss.

So, I have been debating whether or not to post a photo of her but I decided to go ahead.

This is her!



The coolest thing is that I didn't even see a photo of her until days after I started talking to her on OKC. I initially messaged her because I liked her profile, and her interests. The only photo she had on her profile was a photo of downtown Austin. I never asked her for a photo, she sent it to me on her own accord, and I was pleasantly surprised.

I can see that; nice find ...

I always thought it was perceived to be unmanly to ask permission to kiss.

i think it's dumb not to ask... people should ask. don't assume anything is ok to do with someone you don't have an established relationship with.

Hmm. I understand your point of view on it - if you didn't want the guy kissing you, it's better for him to ask and you say no, than for him to lean it and you have to even more awkwardly turn your head/step back, whatever.

But I also just picture a romantic moment when it just feels right and you both are hugging and maybe looking at each other - I think asking would interrupt the moment. Why not just go for it? Again, as long as it really feels right and it feels like the girl will reciprocate.

Haha I just can't over think it when the time comes.

Are you starting off your 3rd date with a kiss?

Also, if he would have just gone in and kissed you at the end of your 2nd date, you would have enjoyed that - you said you wanted him to kiss you.

Hmm. I understand your point of view on it - if you didn't want the guy kissing you, it's better for him to ask and you say no, than for him to lean it and you have to even more awkwardly turn your head/step back, whatever.

But I also just picture a romantic moment when it just feels right and you both are hugging and maybe looking at each other - I think asking would interrupt the moment. Why not just go for it? Again, as long as it really feels right and it feels like the girl will reciprocate.

Haha I just can't over think it when the time comes.

Case by case basis, I'd say. Personally I'd feel pretty weird ever asking for permission. Either it feels right or... not. But then I've never claimed to be good at this stuff.

It depends upon the fuck-factor, however, overall, I've never outright asked ...

I always thought it was perceived to be unmanly to ask permission to kiss.

i think it's dumb not to ask... people should ask. don't assume anything is ok to do with someone you don't have an established relationship with.

Also, it would get really awkward if you asked "can I hold your hand?", "can I give you a hug?", " can I put my hand on the small of your back when walking with you?", "can I get the door for you?", etc. I dont at all think it's wrong to assume some things are ok without having to ask. Kissing, included. You are "asking" by leaning in for the kiss. "is this ok?" if the person kisses back, yes. If not, no.

Kind of; yes ....

I always thought it was perceived to be unmanly to ask permission to kiss.

i think it's dumb not to ask... people should ask. don't assume anything is ok to do with someone you don't have an established relationship with.

Also, it would get really awkward if you asked "can I hold your hand?", "can I give you a hug?", " can I put my hand on the small of your back when walking with you?", "can I get the door for you?", etc. I dont at all think it's wrong to assume some things are ok without having to ask. Kissing, included. You are "asking" by leaning in for the kiss. "is this ok?" if the person kisses back, yes. If not, no.

Yeah, this sounds about right to me.

hahaha honestly i don't know. i'm coming from a different POV than you. as someone who does kinky shit with people, i've become very accustomed to asking before i do most things that involve touching (if i don't have a relationship with the person). i appreciate it when people ask. having the option of saying no to "can i kiss you?" is way less awkward than having to push someone away because you don't want them to kiss you. i have had a guy try to kiss me who i didn't want to kiss and he didn't ask. it was terrible, and i really had to use bodily force to get him away. on the flip side of that coin, if someone asks "can i kiss you" and i do want to kiss them i think it's awesome that they asked. i don't think of them as being a wimp or anything. it probably would make me more eager to kiss them actually.

if i've kissed someone once before, i don't continue to ask them that every single time.

So basically you're saying that you like to be the dom, and the dude to be the sub, even outside of the bedroom!

I have a pretty big dilemma on my hands with regard to my eczema. I've been taking my copper supplements, taking cold showers, putting lotion on 3x a day and it is getting better, but if I go out in this heat (it was 109 yesterday, supposed to be 105 today), it flares up unbelievably red and itchy. I wore a long sleeve shirt and jeans on our date last Saturday night, despite the heat, because my arms look pretty bad.

The dilemma is I am obviously going to have to do this again for our date this weekend because it's not cleared up yet. I'm sure she'll notice that I've worn long sleeve shirts two dates in a row, even though it's well over 100 degrees. If she asks, I'll tell her, but I'm not going to volunteer the info - what a fucking turnoff that would be. But, I will need to tell her eventually if this takes it time to clear up. How do I go about telling her? When is the right time? 3rd date, etc?

She loves doing outdoor things (in fact she is at an outdoor concert right now), but I just can't do outside things right now. I love outside things too, but the eczema is making me stay indoors as much as possible.

Ugh, this is just shitty timing. Why did I decide to start talking to somebody on OKC when I have this eczema outbreak? What do I do?

So basically you're saying that you like to be the dom, and the dude to be the sub, even outside of the bedroom!

no that isn't what i'm saying. that depends on the person. but anyways, it's got nothing to do with that.

I know! I was just giving you a hard time.

Any advice for me?

i wish i did. like i already told you, i have had eczema on my legs for years. i have noticed that when i take my allergy medication EVERY DAY and use shea butter every night and morning it tends to be less itchy. benadryl pills also help. honestly, i think you may just have to wear a short sleeved shirt and say yeah, i have eczema, it sucks, whatever. for all you know she might have it too.

Yeah, I might just do that. Even if she doesn't have it, she may have helped somebody with it. She's an esthetician.

having the option of saying no to "can i kiss you?" is way less awkward than having to push someone away because you don't want them to kiss you.

I can't even imagine the awkward few moments that would follow being told no, having asked permission to kiss someone. But then I'd never decide to kiss someone and then just lean in and go to town, regardless of the reaction I got. Your mouth-rapist wasn't the most perceptive person, I don't think.

Guys have tried to kiss me and I have had to say "no thanks" a couple of times.

I hung out with a woman that I knew as a kid a couple years ago. We talked about all the people we used to both know and laughed a lot. Her husband had died a couple years earlier. So as I was leaving her house I asked her, she said no and I replied that I completely understood and it was fine.

Surprisingly the next time I tried to come by her dad who is like 98 really gave me a hard time and refused to let me speak to her. How fucking stupid is that. Anyway I guess he's really into the all jesus and damnation stuff and thinks it's improper to even ask since she's a widow and as old as I am.

I took the fact that she said no meant she wasn't really interested in it going any further and so along with her dads reaction I haven't really spoken to her again. Just as well.

Haha I just laughed at the picture of a 100 year old father giving a 60 year old man a hard time about trying to kiss his daughter.

Yea, she was married... it's not like she was a virgin.

Hahaha ....
Wow; just ...
... WOW!

Ya got to stay young until you die. 

This is awesome and relates to this thread and tricky's.


Speed Dating