Loaded-Gun.Com - Anti-Social.Com's Rejects!

General Category => Sex/Gossip => Topic started by: Libertine on October 07, 2009, 01:26:14 PM

Title: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Libertine on October 07, 2009, 01:26:14 PM

Probably the only funny thing I've ever seen linked from Maxim
http://www.maxim.com/humor/stupid-fun/84487/5-stages-most-relationships.html (http://www.maxim.com/humor/stupid-fun/84487/5-stages-most-relationships.html)

(http://cdn2.maxim.com/maxim/files/2009/10/06/5-stages-most-relationships/stage1final.png)
(http://cdn2.maxim.com/maxim/files/2009/10/06/5-stages-most-relationships/stage2final.png)
(http://cdn2.maxim.com/maxim/files/2009/10/06/5-stages-most-relationships/stage3final.png)
(http://cdn2.maxim.com/maxim/files/2009/10/06/5-stages-most-relationships/stage4.png)
(http://cdn2.maxim.com/maxim/files/2009/10/06/5-stages-most-relationships/stage5.png)

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Zoomie on October 07, 2009, 04:03:31 PM

Quote

You now masturbate more often than you have sex

Uh oh...

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Daddy on October 07, 2009, 05:08:32 PM

Sounds like ten years of marriage.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Zoomie on October 07, 2009, 06:36:16 PM

You're half right...

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 08, 2009, 12:27:17 AM

I think when I start a relationship I'm already in stage four.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Wozzeck on October 08, 2009, 12:31:26 AM

 I think this must only apply with women too normal for me to even want to date.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: underclass on October 09, 2009, 02:41:38 AM

"did you eat your previous partner" is not the most common qualifier

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Thrash on October 10, 2009, 04:43:56 PM

I've never so much as even been engaged; I'm still not safe though ....

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 11, 2009, 08:40:33 AM

I've been engaged a few times.  I'm going to melt down the rings and make a big ring with a few diamonds on it.  That way I can marry the person I love most, me.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Thrash on October 11, 2009, 11:38:27 AM

How about this; you and I get married and never see each other ...
At this point, it's the most logical thing ...
Pre-nup required though ...

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 11, 2009, 06:42:46 PM

If there is a pre-nup, then what's in it for me?

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Zoomie on October 11, 2009, 07:18:04 PM

You have to fly to FL and give up the balloon knot on his birthday every year.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 11, 2009, 08:08:30 PM

That has a $20,000 a year price tag on it.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: FAH-Q on October 11, 2009, 08:11:46 PM

Plus the cost of the flight, or is that included?

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Zoomie on October 11, 2009, 08:25:27 PM

Better be bleached and airfare inclusive...

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Thrash on October 11, 2009, 09:56:06 PM

I ready pay 20k/yr to someone, thanks ...

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 12, 2009, 08:41:11 AM

I don't have to get married to have anal.  I just think if I was ever to actually get married there should be something I get out of it.  We aren't in love so I think cash is an acceptable thing to request.

(http://lisawallerrogers.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/jackie-with-ari-1969.jpg)

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Thrash on October 13, 2009, 02:14:10 AM

Again, I already shell out 20k/yr to 3 different people ....
What's one more?

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 13, 2009, 03:27:11 AM

Gucci doesn't buy itself!

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Libertine on October 13, 2009, 10:26:55 PM

Quote from: 13chemicals on October 13, 2009, 03:27:11 AM

Gucci doesn't buy itself!

This is the kind of honesty I can respect.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Zoomie on October 14, 2009, 08:10:56 AM

There are two kinds of whores: Those who accept cash and those who accept wedding rings.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: underclass on October 14, 2009, 08:30:19 AM

I thought she was just a slut, now you're telling me she's a whore

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Drugmoth on October 14, 2009, 07:56:06 PM

I've kissed a whore once.  Never fucked her though.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: FAH-Q on October 14, 2009, 08:07:47 PM

I shot a whore in Reno, just to watch her die.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Drugmoth on October 14, 2009, 08:27:09 PM

That would be badass if it were true.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: 13chemicals on October 15, 2009, 12:56:26 AM

FAH-Q is too much of a pussy to take the training wheels off of his bike, so I don't think he could ever shoot a whore.

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: Drugmoth on October 15, 2009, 01:42:08 AM

tr00

Title: Re: 5 Stages of Most Relationships
Post by: hip on October 15, 2009, 01:46:16 AM

aww FAH-Q, no she di-in't!