I was sitting at my desk getting ready to actually go and do something other than yell at the interns for fucking up the servers (they actually decided to use their shared single brain cell for something other than Star Wars Galaxies talk and learned how to set up our new router and firewall on their own). Anyway, someone calls me up and says "Someone rooted the Linux box." I thought about that for a moment and then asked the fellow, "Please, tell me, when, which box and how did you figure out that someone rooted it?" The reply was a few seconds of silence followed by, "I can't get online to check my e-mail." I asked him for his ID number and name which he gladly gave, in fact he even voulentered his SSN. I looked at his workstation and found he's not even hooked up to ANY linux computer, not even our main proxy. Well... I tell him and he said that he still didn't internet access and couldn't check his e-mail. About five minutes of this and then I do a permissions check and find out that he has three write-ups for internet usage while working. This caused my direct boss to lock his computer to ONLY local LAN and he was trying to get to his g-mail. I think about it and tell him "You can check your e-mail, you just can't get outside the offices." He insists that he was trying to get into his company outlook and wasn't able to.
Well, 10 more minutes go by, his boss calls and said that he needs to get back online so his employee can e-mail his daughter because it's the only way he can get ahold of her. I know that he got a blackberry from the company. It was given to him when he was promoted and it is not on the same network as the rest of our equipment. I tell him to use that. I get silence and then the guy says that his employee SOLD the blackberry. It is company property and he was made to sign an agreement with the company for the thing that he understands that it is not his. I contact HR about this, send them the taped conversation of the employee in question explaining that he didn't know it was the company's and not his. HR contacts the police, this guy's getting charged with theft. The guy he sold it to will be brought up for reciving stolen goods. I like my job.