This thread will be a place where people can share weird dreams that they've had.

This morning, I dreamed that I was watching a video of a sock puppet baby vomiting up bags of heroin.  In the dream, it had gotten over 3 million hits.

I dont dream, I do.

I dreamt I got drunk on St Patricks day

Ok I'll play.

I had a dream about a week ago.
I dreamed all the cars were driving around without drivers and with malicious intent. But then things turned even more sinister. Me and another person were trying to get across town by running from building to building and hiding from the cars when we ran into another group who were being attacked by some very strange and video game like weapons of some sort. I watched a couple of heavily armed guys get blown away by something coming from outside the door I was close too. So I peeked around and there was a little girl heading my way. She apparently was the source of the attack.

Perhaps if you have ever seen the game F.E.A.R. you would have an idea of what she looked like. Not cute in the least. She was already too close for me to try and run away.  So then I realized I had this old cap & ball pistol in my pocket that only had one shot and I pulled it out.

Just as she arrived at the door I stepped out and fired point blank at her face. The gun misfired as these thing have a tendency to do and she grabbed my other arm and started spouting some kind of freaky shit which I expected was some form of incantation or spell, possibly whatever she had used on the others but she now had a firm hold on my arm and there was no escape.

I re-cocked the gun and fired again, another misfire and again, and again almost in a panic by now. On the fourth try the weapon fired and she stopped talking and got a puzzled look on her face. There was no visible blood or other obvious indication that she had actually been hit. But a few seconds later she simply said "Huh, milliseconds." then fell flat on her face seemingly dead as a board.

The others in the group who had been hiding from her came out and thanked me but I never did know if she was actually dead or simply knocked out. C & B weapons are a little on the puny side compared to modern weapons and I wasn't sure that the bullet hadn't simply bounced off her head and knocked her out since there wasn't any blood.

But at least the immediate threat was over.

It was very strange, obviously influenced heavily by the games I play. But also could possibly make an interesting short story.

I don't know what she meant saying "milliseconds" but I think she was commenting on the delay it took the weapon to actually discharge after the hammer fell and the cap went off. Or she could have been commenting on how long it took for her to realize she had actually been shot. Either way it seemed a strange thing for her to say.

I never did find out what the deal with all the cars was either.

Last Saturday, while I was trying to sleep off Friday night, I kept dreaming that God was sitting on the end of my bed telling me the my job was stupid and I should be doing something else with my life.

I knew I wasn't happy with my job, but I don't need deities showing up in my dreams telling me that I'm pissing my life away.

I dreamed I was watching a Zeppelin launch yesterday. It was really exciting in a super nerdy sort of way.

I still had a dream. It was a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I had a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

I had a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I had a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I had a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I had a dream today.

I had a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I had a dream today.

I had a dream that there was this evil tree with evil red roots that kept growing and trying to spread it's evil via it's roots.  That's all I can really explain about it, that in itself was hard enough for me to put into words and I REALLY simplified it.  All my dreams are usually too fucked to explain.

A couple nights ago I had a dream that I was friends with a woman (played by Paris Geller from Gilmore Girls, for some reason) whose family owned an old House that was rumored to be haunted or cursed or some such shit, and that no one who'd ever stayed overnight in the place had lived through to morning.  For some unexplained reason she invited me and a bunch of other people to stay there, and for some even further unexplained reason we all accepted and took the trip to the place.  We started looking around, and then Paris disappeared, and the shit went down.  Everyone in the house  was then stalked and killed by their own personal horror movie villain.  Mine was apparently Freddy Kruger, and he never managed to catch me, but as I ran through the house I saw the others being chopped up and dismembered by Jason Voorhees, the people from The Hills Have Eyes, and I think even the girl from The Ring, among others.

A couple nights ago I had a dream that I was friends with a woman (played by Paris Geller from Gilmore Girls, for some reason)

Christ on a cracker, I totally forgot you were in love with that televised abomination.  Did you have pseudo-witty unrealistic fast-paced banter with her about your preference for Tampax tampons?

Wednesday night I had a wet dream. I dreamed that I was sucking my own cock! Haha. I think it's because earlier in the day I was talking with my co-workers about this and we discussed how we would never leave the house if we could do this.

Gotta say I'm down with Paris.

Dreams? You probably have to sleep more than I do to dream...

Wednesday night I had a wet dream. I dreamed that I was sucking my own cock! Haha. I think it's because earlier in the day I was talking with my co-workers about this and we discussed how we would never leave the house if we could do this.

I've had the sucking-my-own-cock dream a few times before.

Wednesday night I had a wet dream. I dreamed that I was sucking my own cock! Haha. I think it's because earlier in the day I was talking with my co-workers about this and we discussed how we would never leave the house if we could do this.

So the idea of sitting around the house all day with a cock in your mouth is appealing? Interesting...

agree with si.

If it's mine, fuck yes.

If you had a clone, would you and he 69?

Oh man. I had a dream the other night that I had this really sweet fuckin' handlebar moustache! I remember thinking "Damn, I'm totally gonna shave off my sideburns now to let this moustache have total domination of my face!". Then I woke up and there was no moustache...sooooo sad.=(.
Portland is really fucking me up.

Wednesday night I had a wet dream. I dreamed that I was sucking my own cock! Haha. I think it's because earlier in the day I was talking with my co-workers about this and we discussed how we would never leave the house if we could do this.

So the idea of sitting around the house all day with a cock in your mouth is appealing? Interesting...

well, i mean... you stroke your own cock when you masturbate.

and think about it.. when you watch porn, do you want to see tiny penis? no. you want monster cock. you like the big cock. you're a little bit gay too. admit it.

I'd rather watch tentacle porn...

when you watch porn, do you want to see tiny penis? no. you want monster cock.

okay, ron white...

I had a dream last night that I was watching a movie with Parker Posey.  She was angry at some guy, and she was like "UNLOCK YOUR CLOSET, SO I CAN GET MY BUTTPLUGS!!!"  And when she opened the door, it was literally a canvas shopping bag FULL of sex toys.

Another dream I had last night:  I was trying to get hired by a small company, but they said I was too "clean" for them.  So, I broke into their offices the next day to see what they were working on.  It turned out to be a super powerful LASER, but that it wouldn't hurt people, only things.  So, I spent a little time blackening asbestos-laden ceiling panels, melting furniture and floor tiles, and such.  It would heat up my shoes, but not melt them.

Final dream this morning:  I was visiting my friend who recently lost his job and, as he was walking from the "sitting room" to the "computer room", his pants fell down and he fell over sideways.  I woke up laughing!

You left out the part where you then fell down on top of him and his cock went right into your mouth and then his dick turned into a Krazy Straw and you were drinking a delicious vanilla milkshake out of it!

Then you woke and saw some crazy pantless drifter flee out of your bedroom window, leaving you alone with your pangs of sorrowful solitude. 

You left out the part where you then fell down on top of him and his cock went right into your mouth and then his dick turned into a Krazy Straw and you were drinking a delicious vanilla milkshake out of it!

Then you woke and saw some crazy pantless drifter flee out of your bedroom window, leaving you alone with your pangs of sorrowful solitude. 

it was MY dream, not YOUR life.

You left out the part where you then fell down on top of him and his cock went right into your mouth and then his dick turned into a Krazy Straw and you were drinking a delicious vanilla milkshake out of it!

Then you woke and saw some crazy pantless drifter flee out of your bedroom window, leaving you alone with your pangs of sorrowful solitude. 

That happened to you too??!!??

It happens every time I'm at Lucas's house. I love sleep overs there.

I had 1.5 hours of sleep last night. I hate you fucking dreamers. I used to be good at it. I genuinely love sleeping.

I sleep 7-8 hours a night... can't function without it

I used to be able to make do with just a few hours a night. Not these days. Now I NEED 6 hours, minimum. I'm fucked the next day unless I get 6. 7 is even better, and 8 is for days I can sleep in. More than that and I'm groggy for ages once I wake up.