before i was married i was dating a guy who lived with his grandparents. they were old and deaf and mostly they didn't know/didn't care if i stayed the night but sometimes we chose to go have sex at a rest stop in the back of his truck, or if the weather permitted, on a blanket outside.

one night, in the middle of july, we pull into the nearest rest stop and i grab a blanket from the back seat and high-tail it across the field. i'm laughing, wearing the blanket like a cape, and he's chasing after me. it's pitch black and i'm running as fast as i can and i slam HARD into a barbed wire fence. i bounce backwards about five feet and land face up in the grass. the wind is knocked out of me so i can't yell or tell the guy to stop running. of course he trips over me and lands face down on top of me.

fortunately i managed to avoid any barbs when i ran into the damn thing but i was laughing so hard i don't think we ever consummated anything that night.

a year or so before that i was dating a different guy. there was no one home at my house (which was a rarity, since there were about ten people living there at the time) so we decided to have sex on the living room floor. i'm on top of him, just going to town, i roll my head back and rest my hands against his thighs. suddenly he starts bucking around underneath me, mumbling. for a second i think he's getting REALLY into it until i open my eyes and see my fucking dog humping his face. that kinda ruined the moment.

ahh, he had a tiny penis anyway.

anyone else want to share?

danziggity, please don't re-share the old lady finger-banging story.

no please du reshare the gilf fingerbang experience

i think he's getting REALLY into it until i open my eyes and see my fucking dog humping his face. that kinda ruined the moment.

Dude, brest kwote eva!

haha right. thx for putting that in the news box.

It's gonna be a "Best Quote(s) Of The Week" box, I think ...
Yours is the first ...

awesome. i'm going to start picking out our china patterns RIGHT NOW!

 

WINK

That wink better be from the brown-eye in that case ...

wth, i can't believe no one else is sharing. okay, here's another story.

i'm on top again, doing what i do, trying to get him to finish. he starts orgasming and he goes a little spastic, bucking and jerking around just as i lean down to catch my breath. he headbutts me in the face so hard that i fall off him, off the bed, but somehow manage to stay on my feet. my nose feels broken, i'm bleeding and everything starts to go dark around the edges.

i immediately sit down on the floor to keep myself from passing out. he's still twitching and apologizing on the bed while i'm cleaning up blood.

fortunately my nose was not broken but i did have a bit of a shiner for a few days.

One time, at band camp ...

one time i was kicked hard in the face when the girl on top shifted while we were 69'ing.

I got knocked onto the bed by a pair of DD's; problem was, it was my friend throwing his girl down to fuck her ...

one time in an oral sex mishap an errant blast of mine was de-mouthed at a poor time and flew directly into my eye which required about an hour of washing out before i could see clearly again.

that's some nice carry though

I got knocked onto the bed by a pair of DD's; problem was, it was my friend throwing his girl down to fuck her ...

MFM 3 way?

Hey Nick, tell that story about the bird whose mouth you puked in...

there we were, going at it, sort of in a kneeling missionary/her-on-top kind of thing, when my hands (holding her up from behind) slip in the sweat.  she rocks backwards just enough to hit her head on the wall, which causes her to black out.

there we were, going at it, sort of in a kneeling missionary/her-on-top kind of thing, when my hands (holding her up from behind) slip in the sweat.  she rocks backwards just enough to hit her head on the wall, which causes her to black out.

i had something similar, except she headbutted me, not the wall.

I got knocked onto the bed by a pair of DD's; problem was, it was my friend throwing his girl down to fuck her ...

MFM 3 way?

No, but it should have been ...

Hopefully I have one of these stories soon.

I can tell you about me and the 3 asian chicks one day ...

Me telling my then BF while he's balls deep in me that I love him for the first time (he had told me like a few weeks earlier, he really rushed me into that relationship).

Rebound relationships are an evil necessity of life.

'Nuff said.

p.s. his cock was huge, that was a good thing

You -=LOVE=-?!?!?!

I know, it's hard to believe.

ah the puke story... not sure if that's to be wasted on a message board. That's more single-malt-by-the-fireside quality of disaster tale

ah the puke story... not sure if that's to be wasted on a message board. That's more single-malt-by-the-fireside quality of disaster tale

please add this to the November travel plans.

waking up alone in bed at a long-ago boyfriends house, hearing some interesting gutteral groans coming from outside the door. Sounds like his roommate hurt himself in his room, which you looked directly into when you'd opened my bf's door. So of course I opened the door and it all happened so fast...as I said "chris are you ok OH just checking!" and I immediately retreated back to my safe haven. Because my boyfriends roomie was jerking it so hard, in the most unusual contorted position, watching a porno with some huge black dude railing some tiny freckly redhead. I saw everything in that split second, so I hid in the bedroom for hours waiting for him to leave so we didn't have to face eachother.   

That's not how it goes in pornos...

You're meant to blow him to ease his throbbing member pain...

I am here to fixen einer cable...

The story is ludicrous.
Speaking of which, the 5 second Big Lebowski last night was pretty good I though.

I am here to fixen einer cable...

You can imagine where it goes from here...