That just wouldn't work for me. EVERY day is a day of obsessive masturbation.

I don't associate masturbation with "doom"; I'm no Mormon ...

Quit lyin', you have mormon magic underwear...

Nice way to totally shoot down my attempt to put a POSITIVE Spin on the age-old definition of doom.

Sheesh.

Quit lyin', you have mormon magic underwear...

Wonder Twin powers, ACTIVATE!

20 year old women feel great. Too bad, I can't put my penis in them. But I really want to.

you should be putting your penis in as many 20-somethings as you can find. tell a bunch of skanky looking youths you're making a porno, and shazam!

The 20-something's LOVE me ...
... I can have 'em all day and night
... I have 'em a time or three a week

I have the hottest 27 year old boyfriend.  God he is hot.  He gets up from bed with his New Moon trade style body and walks to the bathroom with his big cock exposed and I just think, "Fuck, he's so hot."

Werd ...

My wife told me we were going to get kinky. I got my hopes up. By kinky she meant have conventional  missionary sex. This is now her idea of kinky. To be honest, I'm not even interested in it with her at this point.

Is your wife fat? 

She's got curves and is my kind of woman, but...

.... yes??!?

After years of little to none from her, the desire has waned.

Get it elsewhere before you fucking die!

Good point.

or talk to her about this and give her a chance to make it all up to you.

if that doesnt work, THEN go fuck a bunch of hot and horny young sluts.

word to the motherfuccker

or talk to her about this and give her a chance to make it all up to you.
if that doesnt work, THEN go fuck a bunch of hot and horny young sluts.

Yeah, he IS married afterall, so, what's one more shot?

After third chance, it failed, So here we go on the fourth try.

Whatever happened to "3 strikes, yer out!"?

Yeah but a walk happens after four balls.

He's only got 2 and she's holding them, so ....
... do the math

Are you suggesting he needs to invite another dude to do a threesome with them,

so they'll have enough balls?

Either way, as long as there's sex in the poor dying man's life ...

Her best friend which happens to be an old lover of mine may be coming to live with us for a few months. I'm just saying...

You'll be posting about lesbian sex soon ?

^5

It sure as hell won't be a 3-some at this rate ...

Her best friend which happens to be an old lover of mine may be coming to live with us for a few months. I'm just saying/PRAYING...

Fixed!