Loaded-Gun.Com - Anti-Social.Com's Rejects!

General Category => Discontempt => Topic started by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:07:34 AM

Title: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:07:34 AM: Got this when I woke up this morning, came from an Austin, TX number, with a nice, young (and very drunk) female voice attached to it:

"Hello this is a late night census, and I'm just trying to take a poll of who is the bigger douchebag: Luke or um... other participants of my *giggle* poll... namely Kyle or Dylan... who is a bigger douche?Luke, Dylan or Kyle? Press one for Luke, press two for Dylan, three for Kyle and leave your name after the beep" *drunken giggle turns to loud laughter* "awww fuck..." *hangs up*

I wonder who this could have been?

At least leave me some stroke material next time Sash...
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: tulip on April 12, 2009, 09:09:27 AM: my favorite part is the giggling...
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:09:58 AM: I was gonna say, I'd be bopping it before she said "this".
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:12:56 AM: Yeah nice voice. She could totally do phone sex for CC numbers.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:14:51 AM: I have a Tennessee friend that has nasty dirty phone sex with me. The southern accent is hawt.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: tricky on April 12, 2009, 09:22:18 AM: Luke is CLEARLY the biggest douche. What an asshole. sheesh. :P
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:28:35 AM: All things considered, Luke is the LARGEST douche. Kyle is clearly the biggest douche. And you're dick-prejudiced so shut your polesmoker.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:31:43 AM: I take offense to being called a douche. I'm more of an elitist prick.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:34:08 AM: Read it again, Bob's Big Boy... You're not even in the running. Take it up with the pollster. She'll be awake in another 6 hours.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 09:34:55 AM: Quote from: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:31:43 AM
I take offense to being called a douche. I'm more of an elitist prick.

Yeah, you only scull the DMX thats been aged for 12 years.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:39:03 AM: How many fucking times do I have to tell people?!?!?!

DMX:
(http://www.hiphoprx.com/content/uploads/2008/12/rapper_dmx_shirtless.jpg)

DXM:
(http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/dxm/images/archive/dxm_tattoo__i2004e0740_disp.jpg)
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:42:59 AM: I hope that's a chick cuz that's a mad gay tat for a guy...
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 09:44:10 AM: Quote from: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:39:03 AM
How many fucking times do I have to tell people?!?!?!

1st time for me.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:44:36 AM: Quote from: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:42:59 AM
I hope that's a chick cuz that's a mad gay tat for a guy...

How so?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: tricky on April 12, 2009, 09:45:53 AM: Why can't I be the biggest douche?

Bagman texted me at midnight saying that Sasha wanted my phone #. I suppose she wanted to "poll" me too?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:47:32 AM: Now we know where she got MY number. Luke wouldn't do that to me.

Kyle you are Jew-Burger.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:48:40 AM: With a side of banker.

No one knows my number. :P
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 09:51:13 AM: homeless-joe - +61 0413 306 520.

buggered if i can remember if you need to take out the first zero.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:54:49 AM: That's a long fucking number.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:55:13 AM: I suppose posting it in a gender appropriate craigslist personal ad would be futile. If it's Sasha's phone, she'll appreciate the lesbian hordes coming over the wall at her. If it's Kyle's (which I doubt) he'll just post my number on some gay anal fisting site local to me in retaliation.

I think I posted my own number someplace here anyway.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 10:06:27 AM: Quote from: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 09:54:49 AM
That's a long fucking number.

its a mobile. we dont use "normal" numbers for mobiles here.
+61 is the country code.
my home fone is one digit longer than usa numbers.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: underclass on April 12, 2009, 10:13:19 AM: you'll need to drop that zero
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 10:14:47 AM: Yeah, thats what I thought too. It's been awhile since I have given it out.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 10:17:08 AM: Quote from: underclass on April 12, 2009, 10:13:19 AM
you'll need to drop that zero

And get yourself a hero.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 10:19:31 AM: Quote from: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 10:17:08 AM
Quote from: underclass on April 12, 2009, 10:13:19 AM
you'll need to drop that zero

And get yourself a hero.
(http://allfunteevee.files.wordpress.com/2007/09/greatest-american-hero.jpg?w=289&h=385)
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 10:23:51 AM: Believe it or not, it's just me.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 12, 2009, 10:34:56 AM: Quote from: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:47:32 AM
Now we know where she got MY number. Luke wouldn't do that to me.

Actually, it WAS me.

Quote from: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:55:13 AM
I think I posted my own number someplace here anyway.

That's right. I wouldn't give out information that you'd not previously given out yourself.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 12, 2009, 10:35:38 AM: Quote from: tulip on April 12, 2009, 09:09:27 AM
my favorite part is the giggling...

Me too!

It was a funny juxtoposition against how serious she was trying to be!
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 12, 2009, 10:36:40 AM: Quote from: tricky on April 12, 2009, 09:22:18 AM
Luke is CLEARLY the biggest douche. What an asshole. sheesh. :P

You're going to say this about the guy that protected your phone number?!
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 11:42:35 AM: Quote from: homeless-joe on April 12, 2009, 09:51:13 AM
homeless-joe - +61 0413 306 520.

buggered if i can remember if you need to take out the first zero.

First zero needs to go.

Now I have a number for drunked random calls... danke.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 11:53:59 AM: No, no you don't. It's the number for my 3G.

dunk random txt are pointless given I will only get them when im online.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 11:56:44 AM: hahaha... I was kidding... I hate the fucking things, and only use them for work.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 11:59:12 AM: so im back to pretending i have friends....
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 12:01:09 PM: I'm an imaginary character anyways...

Fuck, my sleeping patterns are all up the shit.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 12:03:31 PM: I have an excuse for the last two weeks, holidays.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 12:04:37 PM: Voluntary or enforced?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: ttfg on April 12, 2009, 12:05:28 PM: I'm the boss.

(doc did suggest it though)
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 12:06:32 PM: ahhh.

Cool!
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: underclass on April 12, 2009, 07:21:15 PM: envy
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: 13chemicals on April 12, 2009, 10:35:12 PM: Fuck I'm hungover! I feel like someone took a shit down my throat and fucked me with sand paper. I think I shortened my life span by at least two years with the thirteen hours of hard drinking I did yesterday.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 10:37:10 PM: Eh. You have a nice phone voice though.

Thanks, I'm going to get that converted to .wav and post it. It was cute.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: 13chemicals on April 12, 2009, 10:51:33 PM: Everything I don't remember doing always ends up on the internet. I feel just like a preteen popstar who gets a shaved pussy pic in a magazine, special yet betrayed.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 10:54:42 PM: And unless you actually are a preteen pop star you shouldn't care if your flaps end up on the cover of People.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 12, 2009, 10:56:03 PM: Quote from: 13chemicals on April 12, 2009, 10:35:12 PM
Fuck I'm hungover! I feel like someone took a shit down my throat and fucked me with sand paper.

So, you don't remember...

I mean, I'm glad to see that you're alive! :D
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: 13chemicals on April 12, 2009, 10:57:18 PM: I'm a preteen popstar in my dreams, just like Danzig.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 12, 2009, 11:00:36 PM: Quote from: 13chemicals on April 12, 2009, 10:57:18 PM
I'm a preteen popstar in my dreams, just like Danzig.

Bullshit!
You are so fucking metal!!!
....just like Danzig.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 11:02:33 PM: Quote from: 13chemicals on April 12, 2009, 10:51:33 PM
Everything I don't remember doing always ends up on the internet. I feel just like a preteen popstar who gets a shaved pussy pic in a magazine, special yet betrayed.

I'm wondering how many preteens need to shave their pussys. Not many, I suspect.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 11:07:07 PM: I intend to research this and will report back when I recover.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 11:39:46 PM: I just like the peach fuzz.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Doormouse on April 12, 2009, 11:43:24 PM: I just like the braces.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 11:44:41 PM: What about the little plumb sized tits?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 12, 2009, 11:46:04 PM: Quote from: Doormouse on April 12, 2009, 11:43:24 PM
I just like the braces.
Quote from: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 11:44:41 PM
What about the little plumb sized tits?

(http://i499.photobucket.com/albums/rr352/Coronach/MichelleRodriguez2.jpg)
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Drugmoth on April 12, 2009, 11:47:18 PM: <3 Michelle
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 11:54:29 PM: She reminds me of that stripper at the ShowNTel who danced wearing only a knee brace
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Doormouse on April 12, 2009, 11:54:52 PM: Hahahaha.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 12, 2009, 11:55:28 PM: Youve seen her too?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Doormouse on April 12, 2009, 11:56:23 PM: No I just wasn't expecting such a fine brace.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Libertine on April 13, 2009, 12:27:21 AM: I like em with knee braces, harder for them to escape.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Thrash on April 13, 2009, 12:52:45 AM: Quote from: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:55:13 AM
I think I posted my own number someplace here anyway.

For the record, it was on here PRE the relaunch, and it's on TSi ...
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Lothar on April 13, 2009, 04:19:03 AM: So, why haven't you turned on the ol' ENIAC and let us hear the voicemail?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 13, 2009, 09:11:54 AM: Quote from: Lothar on April 13, 2009, 04:19:03 AM
So, why haven't you turned on the ol' ENIAC and let us hear the voicemail?

Tape reels are still spinning up.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: taiko on April 13, 2009, 09:13:28 AM: Quote from: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:07:34 AM
"Hello this is a late night census, and I'm just trying to take a poll of who is the bigger douchebag: Luke or um... other participants of my *giggle* poll... namely Kyle or Dylan... who is a bigger douche?Luke, Dylan or Kyle? Press one for Luke, press two for Dylan, three for Kyle and leave your name after the beep" *drunken giggle turns to loud laughter* "awww fuck..." *hangs up*

For the record, Kayne West has stepped forward as the hugest douche (http://www.kanyeuniversecity.com/blog/?em3106=227887_-1__0_~0_-1_4_2009_0_0&em3298=&em3282=&em3281=&em3161=).
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 13, 2009, 10:36:56 AM: Actually I'd say he was pretty cool for admitting he knows how to be an asshole.

So you're still the largest douche. And Kyle is the biggest.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: tricky on April 13, 2009, 11:35:59 AM: Kyle is a a wonderful person with many redeeming qualities. He's a swetheart, I mean.
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 13, 2009, 11:42:47 AM: You know I'd never spoil a running gag without good reason but

OMG WOMAN GET YOUR LIPS OFF HIS COCK YOU'RE MAKING US ALL ILL!!!
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: tricky on April 13, 2009, 11:56:22 AM: He sent a text to me yesterday that said "Happy Res-erection Day." Isn't that cute? :D
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Zoomie on April 13, 2009, 12:08:42 PM: Ain't he just the wittiest lil fuckhead?
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: Thrash on April 13, 2009, 06:00:45 PM: Quote from: eitje on April 13, 2009, 09:13:28 AM
Quote from: Zoomie on April 12, 2009, 09:07:34 AM
"Hello this is a late night census, and I'm just trying to take a poll of who is the bigger douchebag: Luke or um... other participants of my *giggle* poll... namely Kyle or Dylan... who is a bigger douche?Luke, Dylan or Kyle? Press one for Luke, press two for Dylan, three for Kyle and leave your name after the beep" *drunken giggle turns to loud laughter* "awww fuck..." *hangs up*

No, Kanye West is a gay fish ...

For the record, Kayne West has stepped forward as the hugest douche (http://www.kanyeuniversecity.com/blog/?em3106=227887_-1__0_~0_-1_4_2009_0_0&em3298=&em3282=&em3281=&em3161=).
Quote from: tricky on April 13, 2009, 11:56:22 AM
He sent a text to me yesterday that said "Happy Res-erection Day." Isn't that cute? :D

Odd, he sent that to me as well ...
Title: Re: 2am phone message
Post by: mosh on April 14, 2009, 08:19:10 AM: And you instantly got wood...