Why's she standing like a Team America marionette?

Yeah with that one it's not her weight. She's just not attractive.

Agreed ...

I love this show and I really love Raj.

I'ma go put him in the boners thread.

But he cant talk to women unless he's drunk.

Much like Dave.

You know; I have to call "BULLSHIT" on that one ...

Who said we'd be talking?

Yeah!
She's LEGAL there ...

Wait; what?

Clauses in "The Roommate Agreement"

More "Clauses" ...

The Relationship Agreement (In Part)

An "Interpretation" Of The RoomMate Agreement

The Roommate Agreement
September 5th, 2011
Below is just a small list of known rules from the Agreement. The full one is much longer and in depth than this.

Article 1: Upon Becoming a Roommate
Section  1: A roommate gets an ID Card, a lapel pin, FAQ sheet and a key. New roommates may be interested in the live webchat on Tuesday nights called “Apartment Talk.”
Section 5, subsection A: Roommate must drive Sheldon to and from work, the comic book store, the barber shop, and the park for one hour every other Sunday for fresh air.
Section 5, subsection B: Roommate is tasked to bring home all take out dinners. ( Standard orders are located in Appendix B, and are also down-loadable from Sheldon’s FTP server)
Section 9: The apartment’s flag is a gold lion rampant on a field of azure and should never fly upside down—unless the apartment’s in distress
 
Article 3: Co-Habitation
Section 1, subsection A: Past 10 p.m. you must refrain from raucous laughter, clinking of glasses and celebratory gunfire.
Section 1, subsection B: Roommate does not now nor does intend to play percussive or brass instruments.
Section 1, subsection C: The thermostat must remain at 71 degrees Fahrenheit.
Section 2, subsection B: Roommates agree that Friday nights shall be reserved for watching Joss Whedon's brilliant new series Firefly.
Section 3: Leonard and Matt have the right to allocate fifty percent of the cubic footage of the common areas, but Sheldon must be notified in advance via email before this action occurs.
Section 4:  Pets are banned in the room with exception to service animals (including cybernetically-enhanced helper monkeys).
Section 5: The selection of a new take-out restaurant requires public hearings and a 60-day comment period.
 
Addendums:
#1: Sheldon must ask at least once a day how Leonard is, even if Sheldon doesn’t care.
#2: Sheldon will no longer stage spontaneous biohazard drills after 10 pm
#3. Sheldon will no longer practice Tuvan throat singing
#4: Apartment vacuuming shall be increased from two to three times a week to accommodate the increased accumulation of dead skin cells.
 
 
Article 3: The Bathroom
Section 1: Roommates will acknowledge and use the two pieces of tape in the bathroom designated for specific purposes:
Tape A: Located in front of the sink. Person must brush and floss teeth behind the line.
Tape B: Located in front of the toilet, those who stand up to pee must stand in front of it.
Section 2: Before the use of a shower, the party agrees to wash his or her feet in his or her designated bucket.
Section 7: The shower can have at most one occupant, except in the event of an attack by water soluble aliens. 
Subsection B: The right to bathroom privacy is suspended in the event of force majeure.
Addendum J:  When Sheldon showers second, any and all measures shall be taken to ensure an adequate supply of hot water.
 
(Side Note: If someone gets the mirror or floor dirty, before Sheldon’s inspection, they can [and likely will] lose their TV privileges.)
 
Article 10: Visitors
Section 8:  24-hour notice will be given if a non-relative female will be staying over night.
Section 8, subsection C: Roommates shall give each other 12 hours notice of impending coitus.
Section 9: A girlfriend shall be deemed "living with" Leonard or Matt when she has stayed over for A) ten consecutive nights or B) for more than nine nights in a three-week period or C) all the weekends of a given month plus three weeknights.
Section 9, subsection A: Upon a live-in girlfriend, there shall be a change in the distribution of shelves in the fridge.
Section 9, subsection B: Apartment vacuuming shall be increased from three to four times a week to accommodate the increased accumulation of dead skin cells. 
Section 9, subsection C: A change in the bathroom schedule shall be implemented.
Section 9, subsection D: Girlfriend does not now nor does she intend to play percussive or brass instruments.
 
Clauses
Skynet Clause: In the event that one roommate creates artificial intelligence that’s taking over the world, the other roommate agrees to help destroy it.
Body Snatchers Clause:  Roommate agrees to help the other destroy someone who has been replaced by an alien pod.
Godzilla Clause:  Roommate will help the other destroy the entity which threatens to destroy Tokyo.
Time Travel Clause:  In the event that a roommate invents time travel, he or she agrees the first stop is to appear exactly five seconds after this clause of the Roommate Agreement is signed.
Ties Clause: All ties will be settled by Sheldon.
Zombie Clause: In the event one roommate is bitten by a zombie, the other roommate can’t kill him, even if he turns.
Bill Gate Clause: In the event that one roommate is invited to go swimming at Bill Gate’s house, the roommate will take the other to accompany him.
Super Powers Clause: In the event one roommate gets super powers, he will name the other as his sidekick.
Clause # 37: In the event one roommate is ever invited to visit the Large Hadron Collider, now under construction in Switzerland, he shall invite the other roommate to accompany him.
Robot Clause: Roommate must assist the other if one becomes a robot.
Reciprocity Clause:
MacArthur Grant Clause:

Speaking of Sheldon ...
Here are his shirts, explained ...

The Relationship Agreement (In Part)

Articles[/U]
Section 4: Booboos and ouchies - Amy must help Sheldon when he has a small injury (like a splinter).
Section 5: Hand Holding - holding hands|Hand holding is only allowed under the following circumstances:
A: Either party is in danger of falling off of a cliff|cliff, precipice, or ledge.
B: Either party is deserving of a hearty handshake after winning a Nobel Prize.
C: Moral support during flu shots. (As of the end of the fifth season, this section no longer applies since Sheldon and Amy have started to hold hands, though it annoys Sheldon).
According to the codicil of the Relationship Agreement neither party is allowed to pout or be moody on date night.
Notable exception: In "The Countdown Reflection" (S5E24), while watching Howard's rocket launch into space, Sheldon worries about Howard because he does not trust Russian technology (with good reason as the rocket ship actually has a gas leak and Russians aren't trustworthy) and for comfort he grabs and holds Amy's hand, seemingly without realizing he had done so.

(Unstated sections)
Sheldon and Amy's Date Night is every second Thursday of the month and, in the case of there being five Thursdays in a month, Date Night will be on the third Thursday instead.
It is not specified whether it is in the agreement or not, but Sheldon and Amy have a "Girlfriend/Boyfriend sing-along|Sing-Along Night".
Amy must give a 72-hour-notice to Sheldon in advance of a travel|trip. Additionally, she must also check the tire pressure and call the Centers for Disease Control to ask which vaccine|shots they would recommend for the trip.
On the two-year anniversary of their first date, they must go to a nice restaurant and hold conversation and have physical contact in a manner that onlookers would perceive as affectionate/intimate.
Separate sections on career changes, financial instability and what happens if there is an intelligent dog uprising. In the last one Sheldon and Amy plan to betray the human race.
Each party is also required to take care of the other when they are sick as in "The Fish Guts Displacement" (S06E10).
Sheldon and Amy must kiss only on date nights.
Either party must not undergo cosmetic surgery unless it's to look like a Klingon, as seen in "The Bachelor Party Corrosion" (S9E13).
There is a “no nostalgia” clause.

More "Clauses" ...

Articles of the Roommate Agreement
Skynet Clause: Leonard will help Sheldon destroy an Artificial Intelligence that Sheldon has created that is taking over the earth. ("S2 Ep6")
Body Snatchers Clause: Leonard will help Sheldon destroy someone who they know that has been replaced by an alien pod.("S2 Ep6")
Godzilla Clause: Presumably, Leonard will help Sheldon destroy a monster that has destroyed Tokyo. ("S2 Ep6")
Section C: Sheldon can call for an emergency meeting. ("S2 Ep10")
Unnamed Clause: Leonard will name Sheldon as his sidekick if Leonard obtains superpowers. ("S2 Ep10")
Section 9: The apartment's flag is a gold lion rampant on a field of azure and should never be flown upside down, unless the apartment is in distress. ("S3 Ep22")
Section 9: If one of the roommates ever invents Time Travel, the first stop has to aim exactly five seconds after this clause of the Roommate Agreement was signed. ("S3 Ep22")
Section 74C: Leonard must assist Sheldon if he ever becomes a robot ("S4 Ep2")
Unnamed Clause: If Sheldon turns into a Zombie, Leonard cannot kill him.
[Clause] : If one of them will be visiting CERN, they must take the other roommate along. ("S3 Ep15")
Friendship Clause: Sheldon will take Leonard swimming to Bill Gates' house should he ever be invited. ("S3 Ep15")
Unnamed Clause: The thermostat must be kept at 72 degrees at all times. ("S3 Ep22")
Unnamed Clause: Fridays are reserved for watching Firefly due to Sheldon's assumption that it would be on for years. ("S3 Ep15")
Unnamed Clause: Leonard must drive Sheldon to work. ("S3 Ep15")
Section 37B: Miscellaneous Duties: Leonard is obligated to drive Sheldon to his various appointments, such as to the dentist. Leonard must also provide a "confirmation sniff" to tell if questionable dairy products are edible. ("S5 Ep15")
Addendum J: When Sheldon showers second, any and all measures shall be taken to ensure an adequate supply of hot water. ("S4 Ep21") This is supposedly supersedes the occupancy limit on the shower, however it is presumed that after Sheldon rewrote the agreement, this was corrected.
Unnamed Clause: Thursday night is Jets pizza night. ("S4 Ep21")
Unnamed Clause: Selection of a new takeout restaurant requires a public hearing and a 60-day comment period. ("S4 Ep21")
Clause 209: Sheldon and Leonard both have the option of nullifying their roommate agreement, having no responsibilities or obligations toward each other, other than paying rent and sharing utilities. ("S5 Ep15")
Unnamed Addendum: Once a year, Leonard and Sheldon take one day to celebrate the contributions Leonard gives to Sheldon's life, both real and imaginary. Leonard does not get breakfast in bed, the right to sit in Sheldon's spot, or permission to alter the thermostat; the only thing that Leonard gets is a thank-you card. This day is called "Leonard's Day." ("S5 Ep15")
Roommate Review: Once a year (presumably), Sheldon assesses Leonard's worthiness as a roommate. ("S6 Ep2"). It is unknown what the failure of this assessment leads to, however fines or expulsion are possible.
Unnamed Clause Leonard has to put up with Sheldon's craziness. ("S6 Ep15")
Section 27, Paragraph 5: The roommate agreement, like the American flag, cannot touch the ground. ("S6 Ep15")
Unnamed Clause Once a day Sheldon must ask how Leonard is.
Unnamed Clause Roommates must notify each other 12 hours in advance if they wish to have a house guest.
Unnamed Clause Sheldon settles all ties to one-against-one.
Unnamed Clause Any changes in furnishings have to be approved by the furnishing committee (which is Sheldon) which meets on alternate years on his spot. ("S7 Ep16")
Section 8, Subsection C, Paragraph 4 - Coitus - Roommates shall give 12-hour notice of impending coitus ("S3 Ep22").
Unnamed Clause: In the case that the Cohabitation Rider is activated the distribution of fridge shelves goes from two personal shelves (one for Sheldon and one for Leonard) and one communal shelf to three personal shelves (one for Sheldon, Leonard, and whomever is living with the pair) and the door being convered to communal status. It is unknown what the shelf distribution is configured to when the Cohabitation Rider is not activated. It is also unknown what occurs if there is only one or four occupants.
Unnamed Clause: Pieces of tape on the bathroom floor specify where one should stand when flossing or peeing. Evidence uncovered during an inspection of incompliance will result in the loss of TV privileges ("S4 Ep20").
Unspecified Clauses
Since the “Sweaty Night of '06”, Sheldon has control of the thermostat in the apartment, which is set at 72 degrees. ("The Staircase Implementation")
Leonard has the right to allocate fifty percent of the cubic footage of the common areas in the apartment, but only if Sheldon is notified in advance by e-mail. ("The Staircase Implementation")
Pets are banned under the roommate agreement, with the exception of service animals such as cybernetically-enhanced helper monkeys, and seeing-eye dogs ("The Plimpton Stimulation")
No "hootennany|hootennanies", sing-alongs, raucous laughter, clinking of glasses, celebratory gunfire, or barbershop quartets after 10 PM as well as no whistling, no spontaneous Biohazard drills, or Tuvan throat singing ("The Roommate Transmogrification", "The Werewolf Transformation" and "The Agreement Dissection")

Friendship Rider
Appendix C - Future commitments
No.37: In the event one friend is ever invited to visit the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland, he shall invite the other friend to accompany him. ("S3 Ep15")
If one friend gets super powers, he will name the other one as his sidekick. ("S2 Ep10") ("S3 Ep15")
If one friend is bitten by a zombie, the other can't kill him. ("S3 Ep15")
If one friend wins a MacArthur grant, he must mention the other friend in his speech. ("S3 Ep15")
If one friend gets invited to go swimming at Bill Gates' house, he will take the other friend to accompany him. ("S3 Ep15")
Cohabitation Rider
Unnamed Clause: A girlfriend shall be deemed “living with” Leonard when she has stayed over for:
A: ten consecutive nights, or
B: more than nine nights in three week period, or
C: all the weekends of a given month plus three weeknights. ("S2 Ep10")

Apartment 4A Layout