Pineapple sized proportions apparently.

So, you want a gay-looking RealDoll?

Time to get this fucker back on track.

Nearly three weeks after my first date with the OKC girl, I had my second one. (tonight). Seriously, I thought that I was blown off weeks ago. Long story, but basically she needs to attach her cell phone to her leg like an ankle monitor. She's left her phone in a friend's car the weekend we were supposed to go out, and then she left it at a friend's in San Antonio back on 7/3 so the date we were supposed to go on 7/5 never happened, and I never heard from her until last Sunday. By that time it had been so long I thought she was disinterested, and started chatting with a couple of other girls on OKC.

So I was surprised when I got two texts from her Sunday. Confused too. I really wasn't that excited, because she didn't apologize about cancelling the date, or at all. I'd just about blown her off myself. Waited a day or two before I replied, and then we talked and I made plans to grab some Thai food and go bowling tonight. Picked her up (she invited me in to meet her dog, which was a great sign - she allowed me into her space already!)

I don't have the time to explain how awesome the night and date was tonight. We had a very good night, conversation flowed easily, joking, flirting, touching, laughing, copious amounts of eye contact, smiling and remembering some things from my Communication class in college, she was mirroring what I did at dinner at times. For instance I put my hand under my chin as in a "thinking" pose, and she did it unconciously a few seconds later, and a few other times. I remember in my communication class that when somebody mirrors you it's a great sign on a date that she is into you. When a woman mirrors your actions, it is definitely subconscious, and a strong sign that she is interested in you.

Aside from all that, I just had a really GREAT time with her. It's amazing what a 28 y/o and 31 y/o have in common and can talk about... coming from a relationship where I was 10 years older than my ex. Haha she had me laughing many times throughout the night and I had her too! I like how she mocked OkCupid, calling it OkStupid. Also, when we were about to get to the Thai resturant she just randomly says "Hey, let's go see my grandparents. I'll introduce you." It was so sudden and off the cuff I thought she wasn't talking to me or something despite being the only one in the car. I said nothing, and she played the game for 10 seconds or so while it got more and more awkward until she finally laughed and said she just did that to see how I'd react. Her grandparents apparently live really close to the Thai restaruant we went to.

She has manners (thanking the waiters, me, etc.) Apologizing for what happened with not hearing from her and having the date cancelled because of that, offering to pay for the next date because I've paid for both the first and second, etc.

She has 5 tattoos! HOT. Gauges! HOT. Cute, petite, modest/shy.  HOT.

I didn't end up kissing her, because she was holding her chihuahau near her face and I didn't want to my face bit - he was barking and nipping at my ankles the whole time I was in her apartment. (all of 3 minutes). But we had a sexy hug - I put my hands down low on her back. I left, feeling GREAT. She said she wants to do something again - maybe catch a roller derby match.

Finally, she texted me that she had an amazing time!

Oh shit guys... oh shit. This is crazy.

Awww, Kyle's (almost) all grown up and having REAL dates!

^Been gone for 3 years and I see nothing has changed.

And you're surprised by this?

Welcome back ...
YAY!

More asssex talk!

Man, it's hard to get in contact with this girl. After she texted me she had an amazing time on Wednesday night I didn't hear from her until Saturday, and that was only after I texted her. She playing hard to get? I only got one text Saturday, and sent her one about going to a roller derby match. No response and nothing today either. I'm just going to have to roll my eyes if she says she left her phone in her friends car again...

I'll call her Wednesday if I don't hear from her. The date went well (at least to my eyes) so what gives? She hinted about wanting to see my place "I wonder what your if place is like - if it's nicer than mine." laughing, easy convo, very comfortable, no awkwardness except at the end of the date when she was holding her dog and I couldnt kiss her.

Oh well, we'll see.

Ironic, at the end of a date, house depending, she's either holding HER dog, or you're holding YOUR cat ...

I actually have a plan. I'll call her on Wednesday and say something like "Since you're taking me out tonight I figure you can pick me up, and that way I can show you my place and you can meet the cats." She said she would get this 3rd date and that's cool with me. That way, when we get back to MY place, I'll invite her in and whatever her answer is, I'll give her a kiss... but if it's "sure" then I'll give her one helluva hot make out session on my couch.

But in other news, while I am waiting around for Wednesday, this gal on OKC has visited my profile twice in the past couple of weeks (the second time yesterday night) and I have her on my "favorite" list to message. I just messaged her because she is really cute, she speaks Italian (of course I sent her a couple of sentences in Italian, being that I lived there in high school), she likes traveling the world and has pretty good taste in music. Unfortunately it says that "She replies VERY selectively" when I sent her the message. So I'll get a nice ego boost if she replies.

The Italian should make you stand out, and she DID look at you twice ...
... however, lay low on that front until after Wednesday

... wait, so Wednesday's a "go"?

Misunderstood; tomorrow I am calling her to make the plans not seeing her. The roller derby match is Saturday. This is going to be sweet. I'm sure if we end up going, she'll want to come in and see my place just to have a little looksie-poo. One thing I really liked about her apartment is it's impeccably clean. I walked in and angels started singing. She looks like she is OCD in her cleaning, and boy am I too! That was one of the biggest reasons my ex had to move the fuck out - she left crap all over my place and I HATED it and she HATED me bringing it up to her, despite it being MY FUCKING PLACE. A couple of weekends ago I took a roadtrip to Houston with my step-dad and his dad. When they got in the car they were like wow did you just clean it? Haha I actually was feeling dirty in the car because I hadn't cleaned it yet. They thought it was unbelievably clean but I felt like it was dirty as fuck.

So she'll like my place - I've been spending about an hour each day this week cleaning/dusting a little area. Not that it wasn't already clean, but now it's PREPPED FOR SURGERY.

Anyway, hopefully... after the roller derby match and whatever else she has planned (if anything), and we get back to my place, I'll invite her up for a few minutes and she'll oblige, we'll be comfortable and private, and a make out session will ensue and I will have caught up with tricky.

I know chicks like to snoop, and I have my cloned-cock, my pocket pussy, and my ex-gfs cloned vagina all on my shelf in my closet that you can easily see from the bathroom. Hahaha. Need to hide it before I forget and leave it out.

Not that it wasn't already clean, but now it's PREPPED FOR SURGERY.

New season's not till September, Dexter.

I know chicks like to snoop, and I have my cloned-cock, my pocket pussy, and my ex-gfs cloned vagina all on my shelf in my closet that you can easily see from the bathroom. Hahaha. Need to hide it before I forget and leave it out.

Jesus, dude, put that shit away. Why would you even want to ever display that shit, to anyone? You wouldn't leave cum stained paper towels around, would you?

Why don't you just wear a speedo on your next date with the head poking out...

You taking lessons from Tru or what?

... or show us a pic of the cloned vagina

Hey ... I've never worn speedos even once my whole life.

I grew up as an English kid in the 80's. Speedos were the norm. Visiting the States in the late 80's or early 90's I got my first pair of trunks (Gotcha!) and then all my friends copied me. Therefore I'm directly responsible for English kids stopping wearing Speedos. You're welcome, England.

A true pub(l)ic service, indeed ...

WELL, BAGMAN??? UPDATES?

One thing to clarify - when I said my sex toys could be seen easily from the bathroom, I didn't mean to say that I have them on display in an acryllic container on a pedestal with spot lighting illuminating the veins on my copy-cock. The shelf is under my work shirts, so my work shirts are covering them for the MOST part. But now, I have put them far, far away. Also... I have my used panties that I bought in Japan hidden far far away. And my box of sex toys and lubes that was on my bedside table, and my horse whip, and I threw out the leftover unopened pregnancy tests I had in one of my bathroom drawers, etc. haha

Updates... ok.

Still on the fence as to whether or not we're going to the roller derby game tomorrow night. I called her on Wednesday, but got her voicemail. She texted today that she's not sure she can pull off the derby because she's stretched pretty thin tomorrow, but she'll let me know. She's booked up through 5pm but may be able to go to the match later.

Another thing I like about her... as I said she's an esthitician at a local spa. She has her own chair and pays no rent or any fee or doesn't have to buy any of her own product or equipment, which is an awesome deal. She has her own clients who come in to see her (Saturday is her busiest day because everybody is off and wanting their facials done, and whatever else). But she wants to eventually have her own spa. Awesome: ambition! I know she's busy so it's not going to hurt my feelings and I will understand if we don't see each other tomorrow.

Oh also did I mention she's been married before? For two years. Divorced two years ago.

Also I've been reading this... http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice_60/82_dating_tips.html

box of sex toys and lubes that was on my bedside table

Other folks may have differing opinions here, but I feel like any lube that's ever been opened (and therefore most likely used on someone else) is gonna be a turnoff to any girl you're now fucking. It's like pulling out an already-ripped-open box of condoms and using the one left. All it's gonna do is make her think about where the other two rubbers went. Neither rubbers nor lube are that expensive, so why chance ruining her sexual appetite to save a few cents?

Good point.

everybody is off and wanting their facials done

... really; do I have to say it?

Hahaha I KNEW when I wrote that you'd comment on it. So, no. I already knew.

Update: No date.

I was having a ho-hum day and I knew visiting this thread would cheer me up.  Thanks Kyle. 

I honestly don't think she's into you.  For example, before the guy I am seeing and I actually started doing it I would text him that I had to see him no matter what.  I have very limited time so we would meet at this bar between his house and my school after I had lecture, even if we were dead tired.... because we just had to be around one another. 

Point is, if she wanted to see you she wouldn't "lose her phone so much."  I give a guy three chances to work it out, sometimes less if they have just a good enough penis, and then I'm done.  I don't care enough to wait around. 

She's a "hook up", not a date for a "girlfriend"; drain your balls and move on ...

... or just move on now

Do I REALLY have to tell you the fun you can have with THIS ONE?

The girl is ridiculously hard to see. I know that she's busy doing her esthitician thing, establishing a client base, etc. I also have a gut feeling that a little bit of her playing hard to see is that she may be worried about getting close to somebody again, being divorced (6 year relationship). So I've been giving her space, and not being pushy about seeing her. We've continued texting throughout the month+ that we've been talking. She immediately deleted her OkCupid account after we met up, and she said that I was the first guy she met from OkCupid (good sign that she deleted her account).

I'm going to see the Chromatics tomorrow night, and I texted her asking if she'd like to come with me. She says she would, but she'll have to make sure she can because she has to come into work Saturday pretty early. It sucks, Saturday is her busiest day. A concert would be a fantastic date for me to cozy up to her, rub her back/upper arms, grab her hand and lead her up to the upper level of the venue the show is at, get closer, and plant that fucking kiss I've been wanting to plant for the past decade.

Most of you don't know the sweet/normal/chill/non-creepy Kyle (I recall Brook saying I was awarded "Least creepiest in real life" after the Japan trip haha). I'm bagman, but I'm also classy, a gentleman and know how to treat a lady. But I have an edge... my ex called me "Vile Kyle." Separately my boss calls me that too. Anyway, I bring this up because this girl is seriously sweet and thoughtful too and after our first date she texted "you're so sweet!" Which normally, would be a negative thing, but I think she admires the quality since she herself is sweet.

Tonight, I asked her what kind of treats her dog likes. I then explained I asked because I thought the next time I see the dog, it'd be cool if I could offer him a peace TREATy so we could become friends and he doesn't bark/get alarmed at this strange man in her house. He was barking at me and nipping my ankles on our second date when I got to see her place. Anyway, that apparently made her heart melt. She said that is oh so sweet, and told me about what treats he likes. GOOD SIGN. SHE IS ACKNOWLEDGING that I will see her dog again and thus her.

I also invited two other women I have been talking to on OKC (the ones I referenced earlier in this thread). Both of them said they'd love to go and asked if we could do something another time, but both already have plans for tomorrow night. Good sign. Backup plans.

She's a "hook up", not a date for a "girlfriend"; drain your balls and move on ...

... or just move on now

Do I REALLY have to tell you the fun you can have with THIS ONE?

SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP