http://www.bluefountainmedia.com/404/

Here, I'll help you ...
"Uno taco, por favor" ...

"Uno" is the number, in this case you'd use "un" which would be more like "a".

And for "the works", you could use "con todo" ("with everything").

con tu Madre?

"con todo" Thanks that makes sense. Not exactly the translation I was looking for but serviceable

So, are we getting some fucking tacos, or not?

You get no tacos bitch.

Dos burritos de pollo picante are all you are entitled too

... as long as I can put Taco Bell Fire sauce on it, I'll be just fine with it!