All 169 Seinfeld Episodes, Ranked From Worst to Best
By Larry Fitzmaurice

I'll tease you with 7-4 ...

7. “The Rye” (Season 7). Actually, maybe this is the worst thing Jerry does during the course of Seinfeld. George pulling the marble rye through the window on a fishing hook cements the episode’s canon-level status, but Elaine’s oral-sex-focused subplot is curiously undersung — especially since a poorly played saxophone is always funny.

6. “The Pen” (Season 3). The only episode that doesn’t feature George, which made Alexander so incensed that he threatened to leave the show if the writers ever turned in another script that excluded his character. That makes sense, but this episode is marvelous — a headfirst dive into the world of Del Boca Vista, where we’re introduced to Jack Klompus and see the infamous astronaut pen that gives the episode its name. A muscle-relaxant-fueled Elaine hollering “STELLA!!!!” at the end earns Louis-Dreyfus a million trillion Emmys.

5. “The Hamptons” (Season 5). A brilliantly constructed episode in which George is the victim of a series of misfortunes, then seems to get the satisfying revenge he seeks — before getting a tomato slammed in his face. At least it’s a Hampton tomato! You can eat them like an apple!

4. “The Fire” (Season 5). Annnnnnd, this might be the worst thing George does in the entire nine seasons of the show. The police officer asking him how, exactly, he lives with himself is a proxy for all of us. Props to the writers for plotting a complicated but totally sound “No bad deed goes unpunished” story involving Jerry and Elaine, where the former’s fulfillment of every comedian’s revenge fantasy results in the latter losing a promotion.

All 169 Seinfeld Episodes, Ranked From Worst to Best
By Larry Fitzmaurice

I'll tease you with 7-4 ...

7. “The Rye” (Season 7). Actually, maybe this is the worst thing Jerry does during the course of Seinfeld. George pulling the marble rye through the window on a fishing hook cements the episode’s canon-level status, but Elaine’s oral-sex-focused subplot is curiously undersung — especially since a poorly played saxophone is always funny.

6. “The Pen” (Season 3). The only episode that doesn’t feature George, which made Alexander so incensed that he threatened to leave the show if the writers ever turned in another script that excluded his character. That makes sense, but this episode is marvelous — a headfirst dive into the world of Del Boca Vista, where we’re introduced to Jack Klompus and see the infamous astronaut pen that gives the episode its name. A muscle-relaxant-fueled Elaine hollering “STELLA!!!!” at the end earns Louis-Dreyfus a million trillion Emmys.

5. “The Hamptons” (Season 5). A brilliantly constructed episode in which George is the victim of a series of misfortunes, then seems to get the satisfying revenge he seeks — before getting a tomato slammed in his face. At least it’s a Hampton tomato! You can eat them like an apple!

4. “The Fire” (Season 5). Annnnnnd, this might be the worst thing George does in the entire nine seasons of the show. The police officer asking him how, exactly, he lives with himself is a proxy for all of us. Props to the writers for plotting a complicated but totally sound “No bad deed goes unpunished” story involving Jerry and Elaine, where the former’s fulfillment of every comedian’s revenge fantasy results in the latter losing a promotion.