Yeah.  Poop.

I've never done this but I've heard some fucking sick shit from some of my friends.

In other news, I feel an office bathroom trip coming on in about 10 min or so.

Making money while pooping makes it like twice as satisfying.

Ok, Dylan; what is this long story you're about to tell us about it?

Hahahaha

I'll start the poop stories.  When I was 16 I got shit faced hammered for the first time.  At the end of the night my friend was driving me home while I was puking outside of the window.  I then decided that I had to go number two, so I found a plastic bag and pooped in it and then threw it out of the window.

Boom Poop Story, out!

Oh, folks,

you haven't LIVED until you've taken a dump, careening down the freeway at 70+ mph,

in ARKANSAS (the states highways should have been CONDEMNED, years ago!  It's pot hole, after pot hole, after pot hole, etc., ad infinitum)

sitting on a little camping Port-A-Pot in the sleeper section of an 18-wheeler.

Such lovely memories...


p.s.  i'm a nurse AND a mom ~ of COURSE i've touched shit.  Miraculously enough, i didn't faint, melt nor die.

Wait; nurse?

You all will never know the horror that is a lactose intolerant digestive system and ricotta cheese.

You all will never know the horror that is a lactose intolerant digestive system and ricotta cheese.

Wanna bet?

Wait; nurse?

<~ taps toe...  Yes.  Waiting...

Wait; a mom?

Wait; nurse?

Dave needs nursing...

Wait; a mom?

I thought THAT as well ...

Technically, I'm a critical care trauma nurse/critical pare paramedic ...

Now I question my (semi-old) profession ...

Wait; nurse?

Dave needs nursing...

My son's name is David.

Way to make it creepie.

Mom?

*shudders*

Way to make it creepie.

Way to spell "creepy" wrong.

His full name is five words and 1 & 1/2 alphabets long.  We call him David, for short.

Way to make it creepie.

Way to spell "creepy" wrong.

Way to get 'life' wrong.

Way to get off the subject of who HAS touched shit with their bare hands ~ only me, so far 

and who hasn't ~ everyone ELSE on these boards.

Thanx!

Yeah, you typed it;  it must be true

No, I have; I told you my qualifications, it's assumed ...

i'm not working as nurse, anymore, nor do i carry a license to.

The only license i carry now is a Class A CDL with all endorsements, save motorcycle: Doubles/Triples; Air Brakes; Haz-Mat; Tankers; School Bus Driver; Chauffeur.  i haven't worked in that field for years, either, and will let that license lapse when it comes due next time.

Is that what you meant?

Or more like i'm a liar, and have never been a nurse or something?

Wait, what?

Anyway, a really hot chick puked on my hand last night ...
Thankfully she full-on kissed me well BEFOREHAND ...