We're diversifying as we speak ....

RAPE BOAT!

Dude, boats are like trains. You get women on board, grab a little wind, let them FEEL the motion of the water, the rocking, the vibration of a properly tuned rig, it like mesmerizes their gooey parts. If there's rapin' to be done, they're likely to do it.

Zoomie, that hat rocks!

Yes, that is my favorite sailing hat and I have gotten quite good at whipping it off my head and onto the galley counter in one quick motion, while diving for the foredeck... with the precision of this guy:


It does indeed rock.

No way man, the pirate ship is way cooler.

We could turn it into a floating restaurant and casino to cover the maintenance costs. And STILL have to work our fucking asses off almost constantly to keep the thing in decent condition.

You pay people at that point ...

That's why smart people buy land and build new, so they don't pour all their profits into maintenance. The way Eric wants to do it would entail buying TWO boats and swapping out operations from one to the other every 18 months or scuttling one and dumping profits into another every two years or so. Fuck that, too much money, too much hassle. Fiberglass is lower maintenance and you can make it look like a tall ship. But again, more money.

As a businessman, I agree ...

As someone who's worked extensively with varnish, I'm all about not worrying with the wooden boat snobbery rampant in my family.

Yeah wtf is up with that? I sail  past guys in homebuilt plywood mini schooners and strip kayaks and they all mutter, 'fuckin' plastic..."

I want to sail 9 months of the year, not 5 and spend 4 keeping the elements out.

...or sail 12 months, if you live here.

Just stake yourself out a nice patch of mangroves for hurricane season!

If only...

Have any of you ever seen the movie "Breaking the Waves."  There is a really sad rape boat scene in that movie that makes me hate fiberglass boats and makes me wish even more that Zoomie would buy a badass wooden pirate ship fully loaded with cannons!

That's a shame but...









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That's right; he's MY dancing monkey ...

S'right.

Does your monkey dance for nickles?  Because if he does, I have a purse full of nickles and a hankering for dancing monkeys.

The cost for a kit for a decent wooden kayak + the time you would have to invest add up to significantly more than the cost of a pretty good manufactured kayak, as far as I'm concerned.

For lesser performance, too.

Kits USED to save money ...

Back when cedar, teak and holly were plentiful and cheap...

any fallout from this yet? I mean, except you lookin' the fool

Yeah the yacht club where we left her is probably gonna get shitty if I don't do something so Steeleye and I are going to  move her down the bay this morning. Been in a gale since we tied up there until yesterday. As far as the Magistrate is concerned, not a peep. The wheels of justice grind slowly, and all...

I have a big tub of this sitting around; I'll save some for you if you need it ...

But a piece of advice kiddos: Never set foot on a boat unless there are approved flotation devices for each person, some sort of hailing device, a fire extinguisher, and if you go more than 2 miles from any shore, aerial flares, the proper notification placards, and a waste management plan.

Did they accuse you of pooping overboard?

No but that is certainly unlawful. They did question the overall lack of toilet facilities, I told them I'd only had the boat three hours.

We were peeing down the scuppers...

Fish do it, why can't I?