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Quote from: Zoomie's TSi Signature
Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own daddy can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him that you accept him as your master so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat the fruit of a magical tree. It makes perfect sense.

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  4. I just went on the most retarded date ever
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I just went on the most retarded date ever(Read 75714 times)
Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #150 on: April 08, 2009, 12:39:42 PM
Wow what an awesome idea! haha
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you treat me like a monologue ho

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #151 on: April 08, 2009, 03:32:12 PM
Seriously!
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ever tried. ever failed. no matter. try again. fail again. fail better.

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #152 on: April 08, 2009, 06:57:43 PM
hahaha ....
I'm all in on this ...


EDIT: A fucking smiley face? HOW!?!?
« Last Edit: April 08, 2009, 06:58:10 PM by Thrash »
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BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #153 on: April 09, 2009, 09:53:37 PM
http://www.fmylife.com/love/836792

Quote
Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for awhile, and we weere joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
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Like yours.  Only different.

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #154 on: April 09, 2009, 10:01:52 PM
He missed.
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Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #155 on: April 09, 2009, 11:30:34 PM
Quote from: tricky
http://www.fmylife.com/love/836792

Quote
Tonight, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to a bar and got alcoholic beverages. We talked for awhile, and we weere joking and having a good time. Suddenly, I put my hand on his ass and said, "soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

Fixed
« Last Edit: April 09, 2009, 11:31:26 PM by tricky »
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you treat me like a monologue ho

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #156 on: April 14, 2009, 03:12:26 PM
i wonder if he's dry humped other ladies butts and came on them? you could start a support group and meet at the bar where he works. that shit would be funny.
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<<<Delete Yourself!>>>

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #157 on: April 14, 2009, 05:41:37 PM
Dude, I already fixed that one in the FMyLife.Com thread ...

Quote from: Thrash on April 10, 2009, 04:42:53 PM
Quote from: tricky
Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for awhile, and we weere joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my ass and said, "Soon this will be stained with my seed." FML
Logged
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #158 on: April 14, 2009, 06:42:46 PM
Quote from: beeyot on April 14, 2009, 03:12:26 PM
i wonder if he's dry humped other ladies butts and came on them? you could start a support group and meet at the bar where he works. that shit would be funny.

He thought he could convince me to let him fuck my butt. I already said "I'm not going to have sex with you". What a fucktard that guy is.
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you treat me like a monologue ho

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #159 on: April 14, 2009, 06:44:41 PM
Quote from: tricky on April 14, 2009, 06:42:46 PM
Quote from: beeyot on April 14, 2009, 03:12:26 PM
i wonder if he's dry humped other ladies butts and came on them? you could start a support group and meet at the bar where he works. that shit would be funny.

He thought he could convince me to let him fuck my butt. I already said "I'm not going to have sex with you". What a fucktard that guy is.

a dude has got to show me he's worth letting in my back door. no way he's sticking it in there before he sticks it in a few other choice spots.

that's weird.
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cream filling for hollow victories

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #160 on: April 14, 2009, 06:46:15 PM
Well I said "I have my period" (even though I didn't) so maybe he thought he'd convince me to let him in door #2.

The thought of that guy doing anything sexual with me makes me want to hurl.
« Last Edit: April 14, 2009, 06:46:34 PM by tricky »
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you treat me like a monologue ho

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #161 on: April 14, 2009, 07:24:08 PM
Quote
a dude has got to show me he's worth letting in my back door.

how much does he have to be worth? like .50 cents? a dollar?
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<<<Delete Yourself!>>>

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #162 on: April 14, 2009, 07:26:02 PM
p.s. i'll save your butt for last trickster.
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<<<Delete Yourself!>>>

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #163 on: April 14, 2009, 08:26:16 PM
Dating sounds so scary these days...

I can't believe a guy would think it was ok to just whip it out and hose you down. wtf was he thinking.




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Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #164 on: April 14, 2009, 08:28:13 PM
He was thinking even if I blow this I still win.
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Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #165 on: April 14, 2009, 08:37:32 PM
lol

Maybe he thought she'd like a nice parting gift?
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Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #166 on: April 14, 2009, 08:38:43 PM
Quote from: daisymae on April 14, 2009, 08:26:16 PM
Dating sounds so scary these days...

I can't believe a guy would think it was ok to just whip it out and hose you down. he was thinking with his dick.



fixed
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Quote from: FB comment
Look dude, there's only one thing I like that starts with Hot Black Co- and it doesn't end in 'ffee'.

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #167 on: April 14, 2009, 09:20:42 PM
Do I have to post another Capt. Obvious pic here?
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BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #168 on: April 14, 2009, 09:24:59 PM
I'll be good I promise.
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Quote from: FB comment
Look dude, there's only one thing I like that starts with Hot Black Co- and it doesn't end in 'ffee'.

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #169 on: April 14, 2009, 09:27:36 PM
Quote from: Doormouse on April 14, 2009, 08:28:13 PM
He was thinking even if I blow this I still win.

pun intended!
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Like yours.  Only different.

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #170 on: April 14, 2009, 09:27:46 PM
he was thinking "this girls totally going to let me do whatever I want here"
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Loaded-Gun.com - I don't know what the hell they are talking about or why they are even there. They don't make serious points and they don't joke, but they still manage to make a lot of posts somehow.

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #171 on: April 14, 2009, 09:52:37 PM
Quote from: Thrash on April 14, 2009, 09:20:42 PM
Do I have to post another Capt. Obvious pic here?
Logged
BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #172 on: April 15, 2009, 05:27:22 AM
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~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #173 on: April 20, 2009, 12:45:10 AM
Hey tricky, my boyfriend just texted me repeatedly that he wants to break up so I guess that I will soon join you in the dating scene.  Book deal, here we come!
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Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #174 on: April 20, 2009, 12:48:41 AM
Hawt!
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you treat me like a monologue ho

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #175 on: April 20, 2009, 12:53:01 AM
Come, my little sex kittens....
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~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #176 on: April 20, 2009, 01:56:46 PM
As if....
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Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #177 on: April 20, 2009, 03:26:27 PM
Like, gag me with a spoon!
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~
A pleasant man with a pleasant weapon

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #178 on: April 20, 2009, 05:21:22 PM
... or a cock
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BOOYA, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Quote from: bagman, 04-29-2002 04:35 PM
Haha I'm gonna get some punani soon ya fucks!

|)__/)
(='.'=) This is the signature bunny. He's hard-fucking-core!
('')_('')

Re: I just went on the most retarded date ever Reply #179 on: April 20, 2009, 05:44:48 PM
Def a cock. Thick and veiny.
Logged
No Nyarlathotep, no chaos...
KNOW NYARLATHOTEP, KNOW CHAOS!

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